Crushing Chronic Dissatisfaction: A 3-Step Cure for Comparison Overload
What Makes a Real Leader?:
Leadership Is Not Just What You Do—It’s What You Leave Behind
Chad Olson, LMFT
Redefining Leadership
I once read a powerful statement that reshaped how I think about leadership: “Leadership includes both what you do and what you leave.” This simple idea shifted my focus from accomplishments to legacy. In a culture that often emphasizes action, achievement, and visibility, we sometimes forget that the most meaningful impact we have is the example, values, and principles we leave behind.
The Most Overlooked Leadership Role: Family
We see leadership opportunities in business, community service, education, and church—but one of the most profound arenas for leadership is our own family. Family leadership is often undervalued, yet it provides unmatched opportunities to shape future generations. Whether you’re a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, or sibling, the way you live and lead within your family can echo for years to come.
True Leadership Leaves a Legacy
A real test of leadership is what others do when you’re not there. Take parenting, for example. A parent trying to instill the value of hard work will know they've succeeded not when the child complies under supervision, but when the child applies that principle independently. If a behavior, value, or ethic continues after you’re gone, that’s leadership. That’s legacy.
Do Parents Really Matter? The Research Says, "Yes"
While studying for my master’s thesis, I explored a hotly debated question: Do parents really influence their children’s behavior, or is it all genetics? One area of research focused on the intergenerational transmission of values—how values are passed from one generation to the next. Studies show a strong correlation between the values parents hold and those embraced by their children. This evidence suggests that parenting does matter. What you stand for, how you live—it gets absorbed, often unconsciously, by those closest to you.
A Personal Example: My Grandmother’s Legacy
My grandmother Taylor was widowed young and left to raise five children on her own. Despite financial hardship, she lived by the phrase: “Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without.” That principle shaped my mother, who passed it on to me, and now I work to instill it in my own children. Through her resilience and wisdom, four generations have been touched. She didn’t just do something—she left something.
Lead Where It Matters Most
Leadership opportunities are all around us, but the most lasting influence often happens close to home. Whether you’re leading at work or within your family, remember this: It’s not just about what you do. It’s about what you leave. That’s what makes a real leader.