Preparing For A Successful Marriage:

When clients attend therapy, one of the most common goals they express is, “I just want to be successful.” Whether it’s in their job, hobbies, or relationships, success feels good. It builds confidence, reinforces self-worth, and provides direction. But what separates those who succeed from those who struggle—especially in marriage?

One answer comes from Confucius:

“Success depends upon previous preparation, and without such preparation there is sure to be failure.”

Preparation is the critical ingredient for success in marriage, just as it is in other areas of life.

To drive a car, a teenager must take driver’s ed, pass multiple tests, log dozens of practice hours, and undergo medical screenings. In contrast, to get married, one can simply fill out a short form, pay a small fee, and walk away with a marriage license. That’s it.

There’s something flawed in this picture.

We ask for extensive preparation to drive—an important but routine task—yet society expects almost no preparation for marriage, arguably one of the most important commitments a person can make. The success of marriages impacts families, communities, and future generations.

While completing my master’s degree at BYU, I led a premarital education class. It became one of my favorite experiences in graduate school. Couples engaged in meaningful discussions around topics like:

• Finances

• Sexual expectations

• In-laws and extended family

• Communication patterns

• Gender differences

• Life goals and role expectations

These conversations peeled back unrealistic expectations and helped couples prepare not just for a wedding—but for a life together.

Family life specialist Cassandra Kirkland of Mississippi State University supports this view. Research, she says, shows that:

“Couples who participate in premarital counseling tend to have higher levels of satisfaction in marriage. These couples also tend to experience lower levels of conflict in marriage and decrease odds of divorce.”

Unfortunately, many couples invest countless hours into planning a wedding—but very little into preparing for a marriage.

At Ascend Counseling & Wellness, we are committed to helping couples lay the groundwork for lasting love and connection. Through our premarital classes and individualized premarital counseling, we provide a space to:

• Build emotional intimacy

• Discuss hard topics with a guide

• Explore shared values and expectations

• Strengthen communication skills

• Plan intentionally for a meaningful future

Success in marriage isn’t a matter of luck. It’s the result of thoughtful, consistent preparation. If you’re engaged, dating seriously, or considering marriage, investing in preparation now can mean a stronger, healthier relationship later.

Marriage is one of the most important commitments you’ll ever make. Don’t leave it to chance. Invest in your future. Prepare intentionally. And let us walk with you on the path to marital success.